Forever will I cry
Forever will I die
Forever will I shed my tears
Forever will last years and years
Forever will I wish to take it back
fill a hole that wont turn black
Forever will I grit my teeth
Forever will I her heart bequeath
Forever will I bite my tongue
Forever will my heart be stung
Forever will last years and years
Forever will I shed my tears
Blood expresses how i feel
Broken is my heart of steel
Hate leaks out of my mouth
My ice heart is beating south
The hatred stares i receive
I care for not I'll make you bleed
All new life can go die
All they'll do in life is cry
Pain is all you'll be
Hate is all you'll see
Fakers will soon die
No draining seconds will pass by
So I'll push help away
I wasn't gonna listen anyway
I won't be pushed around
I won't collapse to the ground
I'm sick of always playing pretend
I'm looking forward to the end
Opening up these veins
Is what keep me sane .
One day you'll wake up and wonder--isn't someone missing?
Then you'll shed a tear because you miss the emptiness.
This sadness is my life; this overbearing theme pushing me further under, stifling each smile, burning beneath each forced note of laughed. What is pure joy...full hearted happiness? I no longer remember it's touch. My only friend is loneliness...my closest companion and yet my silent killer hiding behind a mask of composure and small mindless chatter. My heart is broken, but the pain becomes so numb. Such irony inside my soul.
It's amazing how quickly dreams can die--this silence is my heartbreak--this dreamless state is my fall--this depression is writing the end.
Harsh words & violent blows
Hidden secrets nobody knows
Eyes are open, hands are fisted
Deep inside I'm warped and twisted
So many tricks and so many lies
Too many whens and too many whys
Nobody's special, nobody's gifted
I'm just me, warped and twisted
Sleeping awake & choking on a dream
Listening loudly to a silent scream
Call my mind, the number's unlisted
Lost in someone so warped and twisted
On my knees, alive but dead
Look at the invisible blood I've bled
I'm almost gone, my mind has drifted
Don't expect much, I'm warped and twisted
Burnt out, wasted, sad, and hollow
Today's just yesterday's tomorrow
The sun died out, the ashes sifted
I'm still here, warped and twisted.
Slowly drowning in my sorrow
Wishing things would be better tomorrow
Feeling like I am in an ocean of doubt and despair,
gradually sinking and gasping for air.
Knowing life is not a light switch you can flip on and off
Simply settling and accepting I have to carry on.
Trying to keep my sanity and composure intact
out of fear of how those close to me, might react.
Fears of inadequacy as a human, as a woman, burry themselves deep in my head
As I make a foolish attempt to have a good night's rest in my lumpy bed.
Due to the fact that there are others out there ten times better than I,
makes me afraid and let out defeated sighs.
Since it seems like things will always be this way,
its frustrating because I have to go through it day after day.
Yet, when my quandaries are more than I can bare,
I can at least take comfort in those who really care.
You know who you are, and so do I.
That knowledge keeps me from going over the edge, from giving up and giving in.
